Well, it took 39 years, but I have finally found something that I am not immediately good at. Snowboarding. Wait, check that, I am really good at falling down while snowboarding. By the time I stopped, I was also pretty good at getting back up again.
A typical run went like this: Ride up. Boogey over to the slope. Sit down. Strap in. Stand up. Slide down 10 feet. Fall. Struggle to get into a position to stand up again. Stand up. Slide down 10 feet. Fall. Repeat as necessary to get down to the bottom of the hill.
After an hour of this, my body was numb and my lungs were on fire. Skiing and snowboarding are similar in that the goal in both sports is to exert as little energy as possible while going from the top of the mountain to the bottom of the mountain. I chose to exert the most energy possible while snowboarding.
I’m sure that if I had an hour a day for a week or two to spend just practicing snowboarding I’d get it. Unfortunately, there is no mountain in my back yard. As it is, I only go skiing once a year. So, I’ll stick to skiing for now.
As a side note, while sitting in the cafeteria, I was watching the end of one of the black diamond slopes. The amount of small children barreling down the slope effortlessly was just astounding. Such simple grace and fearlessness! Lucky kids, both being able to afford skiing and to have parents that took the time to teach them or give them lessons. Unless they are those overbearing parents projecting their dreams on their children. I saw some of those too. God, I hate that. “Sometimes is never quite enough. If you’re flawless, then you’ll win our love.”